Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
