Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
