I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
