Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
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