You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
