dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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