Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I just found a bag of teeth...
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
