Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Randomize