when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
