I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize