We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
My breasts were aching with rage.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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