either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Randomize
