Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
