if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
i think i just naturally attract stoners
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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