Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize