My nipple is on Facebook.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I use my feet as sexual weapons
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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