dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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