fuck your aforementioned shoe
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
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