i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
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