How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
Four minutes until I can fart!
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
