that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize