Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
