apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Man, jail baloney is awful.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Randomize
