I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Randomize
