I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
