Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Someone came in the potted fern
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
