Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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