Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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