do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
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