I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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