that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
