I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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