It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
