Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
