two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
