i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize