____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
