WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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