I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
