i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Randomize
