I wanna bring you to show and tell
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
