can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
