it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
