she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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