ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Randomize
