How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
