i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
