She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
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