No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
