He passed out mid-signature
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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