We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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